Friday, April 19, 2013

It's been a hard week

Currently Juliana is trying to convince me it's 3 o'clock and she can be done w/her nap. It's not 3, it's 1:59 and she can't tell time. She's 2...going on 15. She went down early today b/c it was a rough morning. And a rough day yesterday. Her attitude has been horrible this week and I am not sure why. She is constantly in trouble and is always pushing the limits, crossing the line and refusing to listen or follow rules. She is stuck in this terrible place of wanting to be a big kid but also wanting to be a baby.

I am sure potty training is a large part of her attitude. She is as stubborn as can be and will only cooperate when she wants to. If she's too busy, she will go in her pants. Then she is not allowed to do again whatever it was she was doing (playing outside, watching a show, etc) for awhile so (we hope) she will realize, you can never be too busy for the potty. Everyone is telling me this is normal b/c when she wants to cooperate, she is golden.

I have a hard time remembering a day when Juliana was not in trouble. And if it was just her having accidents that would be one thing, but her behavior is terrible. I feel like the worst parent in the world...I am the one that is with her the most. Is it me? Am I doing such a poor job parenting her that this is my fault? Is this a reflection of me? Mark and I were talking b/c I was concerned that it's b/c she isn't getting enough attention but we agreed that over 75% of our time is devoted to Juliana and the other 25% is split between Samantha and Miriam. We try to do nice things for her but w/her behavior being so bad, I don't want it to seem like we are rewarding her bad behavior.

I am going to FL in a couple days and I really need the break. I need some time w/just Miriam. I need some time w/my best friends. I need to relax. I honestly have no idea how people have more than 3 kids b/c I am beat. Done. Parenting is the hardest job in existence and it seems to only get harder as they get older. I will take a sweet nursing baby who grunts and moans and has explosive poops over a 2.5 year old any day.

Please don't get me wrong. I love Juliana more than I can explain, and she is sweet and caring and extremely bright. She is funny and so friendly but I need to know what to do to make the attitude and misbehavior less. I know it won't go away, but just lessen. Soon.


  1. Praying for you! All this struggle is worth it in the end (that's what they tell me anyway - lol!).

    Seriously, though, Sil went through it and Dom still has his days but it is worlds better than before. A lot of it is being firm, consistent, and putting in the time (and not worrying - it will pass) They're all different so who knows, Miriam may skip this alltogether.

    Glad you're getting away. That will help. I am soooo jealous of the picture right now. I would love to have some beach time. Enjoy!

  2. Funny, I was just thinking about how far Abigail has come in her almost five years. She was THE WORST baby ( Coincidentally, I wrote this post the DAY before I found out we were expecting Iris. God gives us these storms to weather for a reason. I've been there so many times- feeling like a terrible mom, like I'm doing something wrong. But you're a great mom for being consistent with her, for not giving into her meltdowns. Your patience will pay off! I know it sounds like a long way off, but four is the "magic" number, in my experience and from what I've heard from others. She still has her moments, but she's been SO much better. Prayers for you during this trying time!

  3. Funny how as I sat down to read your blog, Brian and I were just saying that Matthew pretty much had the worst day ever. Tantrum after tantrum. Yelling, throwing things, knocking over Noah, etc, etc. He even refused to say goodbye or thank you to his Nana, which never happens! By the time Brian got home, I was done and at my wits end. I do believe he even cried because he sneezed at some point today. Days like today, I do feel like the worst parent ever. So please know you are not alone. I swear three is tougher than two. The pediatrician assured me it would get better....I have yet to see if this is true! Hang in there, Mama! You are an awesome mom and truly inspire me to be a better mom, too! :)